Monday, September 5, 2011

Garrosh Hellscream's Lemon Squares


TGF: Hello and welcome to The Gamer’s Fridge interview of the week, Garrosh Hellscream, The leader of the Orcs. Garrosh, thank you for seeing me today. 

Garrosh: Humph, On with it.

TGF: Garrosh, Rumor has it Thrall is coming back to reclaim his place as Warchief. Do you know what your plans will be if that happens?

Garrosh: If Thrall comes back to reclaim his seat as Warchief I would…. welcome him.

TGF: I was south of Ogrimmar a few weeks ago talking to Vol’jin about his Darkspear Jerk Chicken recipe. He is a very interesting…

Garrosh: Interesting! Bah, A troll army can’t even kill one sea witch.

TGF: Moving along, I am here to ask you Garrosh, leader of the Horde. What is your favorite recipe?

Garrosh: The still beating HEART OF A TROGG!




TGF: Well, I don’t know how I am going to serve that. It won’t take much cooking time…”

Garrosh throws his arm around my shoulder and laughs, nonchalantly shoving a scrap of paper into my pocket.

Garrosh: I love a good lemon square so sweet and tangy.
He says under his breath.

TGF: Lemon squares, I would never have guessed.
A nearby guard chuckles.

Garrosh: LEMON SQUARES…I said the still beating HEART OF A TROGG!
Garrosh bellows as he pushes me out of the throne room.



Here it is folks. Garrosh’s Lemon Squares
…I mean, the still beating heart of a trogg or whatever.


You will need:
The crust:
2 cups sifted flour
1 cup powdered sugar
1 cup butter, melted

The Filling:
4 eggs
2 cups sugar
1 teaspoon baking powder
1/4 cup flour
1/2 cup lemon juice

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Grease a 9x13 inch pan.




The Crust:
In a medium bowl, stir together 2 cups flour and confectioners' sugar. Blend in the melted butter.
Press into the bottom of the prepared pan.
Bake in the preheated oven for 15 minutes, or until edges are golden.




The Filling:
In a large bowl, beat eggs until light. Combine the sugar, baking powder and 1/4 cup of flour.
Stir the sugar mixture into the eggs. Finally, stir in the lemon juice.




Pour over the prepared crust and return to the oven.




Bake for an additional 30 minutes or until bars are set. Allow to cool completely before cutting into bars.




I set these to cool overnight and when I woke up the next morning they were gone.
However, there was a two handed axe stuck in my kitchen table.




Peculiar.



8 comments:

  1. FOOL! You insidious and unauthorized release of my Greatmother's SECRET LEMON SQUZRE RECIPE will not go unanswered! Treat carefully and watch yourself now, druid, for Hellscream's eye is upon you!

    Also, the interview was clearly edited to take things out of context and make me look like a tool. WHICH CLEARLY I AM NOT! RAAAA!! Total stitch job there, dude.

    Garrosh Hellscream
    Warchief of the Horde

    ReplyDelete
  2. A lemon square stealing TOOL! I'm not afraid of you! I have My Pal Mal behind me! He's like freaking Dumbledore to your Voldemort.

    I did edit out some of the interview but only the part where you broke into song of "Oh, lemon square, oh, lemon square" to the tune of Oh Christmas tree.

    Ya tool.

    Hugs and kisses, Eden

    ReplyDelete
  3. WTF STEALING?!?! The recipe belonged to my family to begin with, you insipid tree!!

    Also, I WILL HAVE YOU KNOW I HAVE AN ENCHANTING SINGING VOICE.


    Garrosh Hellscream
    Warchief of the Horde

    ReplyDelete
  4. Oh Garrosh!! How can you be such a meany when you have such wonderful bakers in your family?? You can turn more heads with yummy lemon bars than you can with CUTTING THOSE SAME HEADS OFF!!!

    ReplyDelete
  5. He just bent out of shape over losing the popularity vote to "Basic Campfire" and "Mankirk's wife".

    ReplyDelete
  6. I made these today and I must say, great honor belongs to Greatmother for this fantastic and wonderfully delicious dessert! (I did make a small change and used lime juice instead of lemon juice. Oh my! Amazing flavor!) This recipe will be long treasured with my family...and Pinterest. Thank you!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Greatmother Hellscream really knows what she is doing. I've never tried them in lime, did it change the color any?

    ReplyDelete
  8. No color change that I've noticed, but the lime flavor is out of this world.

    ReplyDelete